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This is an ongoing content series on the current EAN website. We have set it up again here so you can continue to use it (if you like.)
Q. An employee is returning to work after the death of a family member. I want to be supportive, but I also need to manage the workload. How do I approach this without appearing too work focused? I’m very concerned that what’s facing us here will get in the way of productivity demands.
A. Meet with your employee in private and acknowledge the death: “I’m sorry for your loss. It’s good to see you.” Let the conversation naturally evolve. You can transition to the subject of workload by asking what would help the employee settle back into the office. Your employee may share information about the death, but you will be surprised at how fast they will want to move on to discussing workplace needs. Explain which tasks need attention now, which ones can wait, and whom they can turn to if they need help. Agree on a time to check in again after a few days. Grief affects concentration, energy, and patience. People experience it in different ways. Being supportive is key, but keep your expectations clear and do a lot of checking in for a while. This will help you pick up on anything your employee may be struggling to manage. Remind the employee about the EAP or workplace resources.
Q. I assign work, but some employees give me no updates unless I ask. The work may eventually get done, yet I lose time chasing these folks down to find out what’s going on. How can I change this without micromanaging, which, of course, every employee hates?
A. Most problems of this nature boil down to communication, every organization’s biggest problem. Think about clear communication as the culprit in most workplace performance management issues and you’ll prevent half of the problems you face throughout the year. Going forward, make updates (communication) part of the assignment from the start. Put communication first in your discussion by explaining what a finished result looks like, when you need it, and what decisions depend on its progress. That’s three key points of discussion. Agree on a brief update point. For example, “Send me a progress note every Thursday afternoon, even if everything is on track.” Some assignments might last for months. In such situations, you must set milestones, but don’t let things just float along or give “How’s it going?” comments in the hallway. With milestones, tell employees what you want: 1) what is finished, 2) what remains, and 3) whether they need a decision or assistance. With these fixes, you’ll discover higher and faster productivity, less stress, and fewer crises on the job.
Q. I’m hiring for a position with a steep learning curve, so no applicant will be able to jump right in. I’ve found that eagerness to learn can matter as much as, or more than, prior experience. How can I spot that quality in a candidate and evaluate whether they’re willing to put in the effort to learn this job?
A. Think about the last time you had to learn something unfamiliar at work. You probably asked questions, tried things out, made a few mistakes, and adjusted. Spot this type of story when you interview candidates. Ask them about a skill they had to learn quickly: How did they get started? What did they do when they got stuck? Did they use feedback? Many employees will say they are fast learners, but fewer will be able to give specific examples to show how. You might also give every candidate the same realistic job scenario and ask how they would learn the work. Observe how they construct a workable approach, not offer a perfect answer. Even someone eager to learn can get frustrated or feel overwhelmed. Enthusiastic employees may also be hard on themselves, so
Q. I believe supervisors would think about praising employees for good work more often if they knew the benefits that derive from it. What are they?
A. When an employee makes a meaningful contribution, recognizing it at a staff meeting or in front of a larger group of people does more than make that person feel good. It has an impact on the entire organization, but many supervisors don’t understand why. Public praise has ripple effects. It creates a “wave” of organizational well-being that raises workplace morale. To make the right impact, don’t just say, “Great job, Maria.” Plan your comments and drill down. For example, “Everyone, Maria noticed an ongoing customer problem. She gathered the team, brainstormed the solution, and ended this problem we’ve had for years. So, great job.” A supervisor speaking like this gives coworkers something to learn about solving problems. It also says to others that effort gets noticed in this organization. Note that some employees don’t like public accolades, so it’s okay to ask the worker in advance if you are unsure. Bottom line: Praising workers helps employees, the team, and the organization, but it costs nothing.
Q. One of my employees regularly challenges the team’s ideas. Some coworkers call him difficult, to say the least, but his suggestions are often useful. Could the EAP help me manage this situation?
A. You have an employee who is a valuable part of your team, but he has an abrasive style that is alienating others. Yes, the EAP can help, and in two ways: either meeting directly with your employee or coaching you on how to manage and/or refer him to the program if you are unsuccessful in helping him make needed changes in his interactions with peers. The key to your success is separating his intellect from his style. You don’t want him to believe he is being criticized for being smart. It’s the delivery that’s problematic. Start by validating his contributions. Then, turn to how his style affects others in ways that you have observed. You must be specific. Saying “People think you are too abrasive” won’t cut it. Examples of behaviors he may display include rolling eyes, sighing heavily, or interrupting. Behaviors of affected peers may include visibly shutting down, stopping participation, or looking reluctant to share ideas. If your direct coaching does not improve his relationship with peers, consult the EAP to establish a formal performance referral.
FrontLine Supervisor is for general informational purposes only and is not intended to be specific guidance for any individual, supervisory, or human resource management concern. For specific guidance on handling individual employee problems, consult with your EA professional. ©2026 DFA Publishing & Consulting, LLC. Gender use in Frontline Supervisor content is strictly random.
Q. What is the difference between using the EAP as an alternative to discipline versus as a substitute for discipline?
A. Using the EAP as an alternative to discipline means the supervisor has a legitimate basis for disciplinary action but offers the employee an opportunity to use the EAP instead, consistent with organizational policy. The employee understands that continued performance problems may result in disciplinary action. This approach preserves accountability while offering help. Using the EAP as a substitute for discipline is different. It means making an EAP referral simply because the supervisor is reluctant to take warranted disciplinary action. This can confuse the employee about the EAP’s purpose and turn a helping resource into what appears to be a disciplinary tool. It may also weaken the employee’s motivation to address the performance problem. The key distinction is that an EAP referral does not remove the supervisor’s responsibility to manage performance. When appropriate, the EAP offers the employee an opportunity to address personal problems that may be contributing to performance difficulties, while the supervisor remains focused on acceptable job performance.
Q. An employee reported that a coworker is using a company vehicle and company time to travel out of state to gamble on horse races. I was already investigating the coworker’s unexplained absences but was unaware of this activity. How should I handle the new information?
A. Treat the coworker’s report as information requiring appropriate followup, not as established fact. This should be in consultation with appropriate management or your human resources representative. Continue documenting the absences and other performance or conduct issues you can independently verify. Avoid confronting the employee with the allegation until your human resources advisor and manager decide on an approach. The reported misuse of company time and a company vehicle raises separate policy and risk concerns. Avoid focusing on whether the employee has a gambling problem; diagnosing and confronting this problem is not your role. Simply stay focused on workplace conduct and violations that can be established. During the investigation, your employee may step forward to confirm misconduct and a gambling problem. If so, follow your organization’s procedures and consider an EAP referral. Also protect the reporting employee’s confidentiality to the extent possible. Discourage workplace discussion—likely to occur when investigations and severe problems like this emerge at work—of your employee’s issues or circumstances.
Q. I referred two employees to the EAP because of ongoing conflict. I realize that my missteps in managing these workers may have allowed their relationship to worsen. What are the most common mistakes supervisors make when dealing with employees who can’t get along?
A. Some common missteps in managing two warring employees include trying to get them to make up and become friends, treating their conflict as If it were a playground squabble. Adult workplace conflicts are usually not amenable to quick reconciliation attempts or superficial approaches aimed at getting employees to like each other. Another misstep is becoming a “couples counselor,” thinking that if only the real issue can be uncovered or a determination can be made about who is at fault, the conflict will disappear. Supervisors who play this role can drift into counseling dynamics that include analyzing personalities or repeatedly helping employees process each other’s feelings. Another misstep is taking sides because one employee is more persuasive or likable. Finally, avoid viewing the EAP as a “fixer” that will end the conflict for good. The bottom line: What motivates employees most to resolve conflicts are the supervisor’s unwavering, believable resolve to no longer tolerate them and clear management expectations that they must end.
Q. One of my employees has been verbally abused by a customer, and she is pretty shaken up. I think she’ll get over it. It happens to all of us periodically, but what are some tips for responding and deciding whether to encourage her to contact the EAP?
A. After an abusive incident, be sure not to minimize or generalize the experience with your employee, but instead provide a private, supportive environment to talk about what happened. It’s the best first step in the healing experience. Most employees, especially those who are concerned, thoughtful, and enjoy their job, will experience an acute stress reaction: feelings of shock, anxiety and anger, and maybe later difficulty concentrating; intrusive thoughts about the incident; or even sleep disruption. These are normal symptoms of recovery, so don’t minimize or rush the process. Also, these symptoms don’t mean an EAP referral is a must, but encourage the program’s use to help the worker feel supported. Past trauma—or historical negative interactions with customers or other people—can often surface and make overcoming a negative event of this kind an extra challenge. If adverse reactions persist or begin to interfere with the employee’s ability to function, then a more direct approach to EAP referral would be indicated.
Q. I have a young employee with great ideas and initiative, but he lacks organizational awareness. Recently, he took an idea directly to our vice president without telling me or my director, making us look uninformed. How do I correct this without discouraging his initiative? Could the EAP help?
A. This is not an uncommon problem among younger employees, so see this as a development problem. Organizational awareness is a learned skill. Your being caught off guard or critiqued by next-level management is irritating, but you should still validate your employee’s initiative and creativity. Make it clear that these qualities are valued but working relationships can be undermined when protocol isn’t followed. Most employees are shocked to hear this feedback, especially after feeling positive about their initiative, but it’s an important lesson. Don’t mention office politics or “how things work around here,” because the feedback is important beyond any other circumstances. Simply ask that the employee come to you first before taking matters further. Explain how others need to be consulted and under what circumstances communicating directly with senior management is appropriate. EA professionals help employees examine workplace communication, so if this continues be an issue, talk to the EAP about how it can help.
FrontLine Supervisor is for general informational purposes only and is not intended to be specific guidance for any individual, supervisory, or human resource management concern. For specific guidance on handling individual employee problems, consult with your EA professional. ©2026 DFA Publishing & Consulting, LLC. Gender use in Frontline Supervisor content is strictly random.
